TV killed the television star

Some would say that TV is the devil. It certainly is a constantly evolving devil. From the old clunky tube TVs that sucked up the little blonde girl from Poltergeist and then replaced her with a replica that couldn’t stomach making the next two movies to the slim and wacky 3d TVs of today, it’s come quite a ways. It seems like only yesterday that people were paying a nickel at the drugstore to watch the movie viewer of a woman exposing a little shoulder. Now we strive to make TV appear like it’s something going on in our home. The whole development in the way we view television definitely makes me think about a lot of things but I can’t get into it without first commenting on the whole 3d glasses debacle. I mean really, who wants a TV where you have to put on glasses to properly view it? Or the fact of what a doofus people look like wearing these glasses:Anyways, this often makes me wonder about what the next developments will be. The other day I think I came up with an idea about the future of television. Imagine a special dome room and once you enter it will fire up 360° of television around. It will be all encompassing and no way to to escape it. This future evolution of TV will be known as RoomVision or RV (and no, I don’t mean RV like the old people alternative to retirement homes). I truly believe if we were able to develop the technology that TV would go in this direction. People will become even more entranced and sucked into their television lives on a whole new level. In some ways, we might already be moving towards this crazy way of viewing. If we develop RV then I bet it would eventually turn into something we would be able to interact with. With all our advances in technology we constantly cut down on communication with other human beings more and more. In order to get a sandwich delivered to your house, you don’t even have to talk to another person. Instead you can punch up your crazy order (hold the tomato, add mustard, ease up on the lettuce, don’t put the mayo on it but instead include mayo packets, dip the entire thing in honey and finally, lightly toast it over a camp fire) on your computer and then whatever restaurant is alerted and your food is on its way. Then you have the awkward moment where you have to talk to the delivery driver. It gets real uncomfortable because you ordered online with the intent of not having to talk to anyone because your dirty and hungover and look like you crawled out of a grave. They are uncomfortable because you clearly have no regard for another member of society. So yes, if RV comes around, I’m sure it will replace peoples need to interact with each other because, who needs to when you can become part of your favorite sitcom or movie?

Me, making my acting debut in my favorite film.

Personally, I’m working towards watching less and less television. I don’t want to fall victim on the day it broadcasts the hypno-signal and a giant man like TV with arms and legs comes along in a cruel dictatorship forcing us into slavery and whipping us with it’s antenna. I imagine once RV comes out it will divide the people. Some of us will have escaped the cold, clammy grasp of TV while the others will be sucked into these rooms, cutting their ties to the outside world. Those of us who decline the visual coma will become known as PreVs and we will revert to living as though it is the era of the wild west. In this scenario I imagine I would most likely become a drifter, wandering town to town doing what I can to help so I can earn my keep and feed for a night before moving on. Or perhaps a deputy, the Sheriff’s right hand man. Of course, this entire situation is hypothetical and highly unlikely but it won’t stop me from working to read more and mindlessly view less.


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